The Damage the Poison Leaves

Sober 40 days.

It took me a week to feel less wobbly on my new sober feet. But what of my liver? My skin? My heart? My soul? My body? My home?

Insomnia is perhaps a body’s way of saying I’m recovering. Cut me some slack. I’m resting. A different time zone and be done with that. If I had a 9-5 job with insomnia it would be more than a challenge. It would be…I don’t know what it would be. I feel that I am almost getting through the insomnia. Today I woke at noon. I woke and staggered down the hall. Half asleep, not awake. It was not unpleasant. It was a sober stagger. My body is tired and it is saying, be kind, care for me some more. Rest and bear with me. Just a little longer.

My liver is repairing itself. I am sober. I am drinking more water. I am eating better. I am moving more. I am sleeping.

How long does it take to repair a fatty liver?
Could be up to 6 weeks.

At the end of six weeks I hope that the insomnia is finished with me and wanders off and spends time with someone else. I also hope that my liver is restored to better health.

I’m going back to sleep. It may be 1pm. But who really cares? I’m an adult. My time is mine and I will sleep in the afternoon if I want to. I have nowhere to be other than here. Good night.

Blemishes

Summertime and horror go together. Was watching Kaidan, Japanese Ghost Story, a few days ago, a story of revenge, then the next day I was reading Allen Carr’s book, “The Easy Way For Women to Stop Drinking” and found the similarity between the blemish/cut on the face stories to be fascinating.

The samurai fails to pay back his loan to the money-lender upon request and in return the samurai kills him and dumps his body. The samurai then suffers bad fortune and ends up killing his wife and himself in a murder suicide. The daughters of the money-lender never know the fate of their father and grow up, meanwhile the son of the samurai is raised by relatives and becomes a tobacco traveling salesman. One daughter meets the son and they fall in love. Their love is tainted because of their fathers so their love is doomed. The longer they stay together the more they ruin each others lives. The daughter gets a cut over her eye. She is tended to by the son but instead of getting better she becomes worse, the infection spreads and she eventually dies. The story doesn’t end there but that part, the cut or the blemish is the point.

The cut/blemish on the face if left alone would have healed by itself. The daughter should never have been with the son. But fate was cruel and they both suffered.

In Allen Carr’s book, “The Easy Way For Women to Stop Drinking”, someone had a spot on their face and kept using ointment to try and heal the spot. Instead it kept getting worse. So they applied more and more ointment. Turns out the ointment was poison. In the film the son was poison. And in life alcohol is poison. I found it interesting the horror story and a book to quit alcohol both had the same poison scenarios. Revenge and addiction served as one.

Sometimes it’s best to leave something well alone.